I was recently sitting around the studio, talking to a good friend, and yoga teacher and we both noticed something interesting about the tendencies of students.  It was not a new revelation, but what we both noticed led us to a moment of lightness and humor.  So, I thought I’d share.

You know how when you need to squeeze in a yoga class and either you’re a little late, or you have to leave a little early?  You know how when you have an injury that you’re dealing with, or you’re pregnant and modifying your practice?  You know how sometimes you have a nagging cough, or the sniffles?  No matter the issue, there’s a moment where students often feel compelled to approach the instructor with their disclaimer.

I acknowledge that it’s all good intentioned, and meant to be a gesture of respect, but I’m so not worried about it.  It’s not that I’m not caring, but from my perspective, I’ve already given you whatever answer or permission you think you need to exist peacefully in the context of your ever-changing situation.  For the record, you can absolutely approach, talk, and make your needs known.  Make your voice heard.  Express as much as you’d like.   What you need to keep in mind is that the instructor is there to serve you.

So, here’s the top 10 things your yoga instructor, for one reason or another, would actually want to hear about before starting class.

10.  I had Texas chili for dinner last night.

9.  I’m here to socialize and be seen, & I don’t appreciate you down-playing that aspect of the practice.

8.  I dig the music you play in class, so much so, that I often tune you out.  No offense.

7.  Cupcake analogies in class are so obnoxious, I’m just saying.

6.  By the way, I hate the  smell of Frankincence.

5.  I’ve got serious daddy issues.

4.  I have no real intention to inhale or exhale completely.  Matter of fact, I’m not really comfortable with mula bandha either.

3.  Just so you know, I pretty much always just mouth my “Om’s”

2.  I appreciate you SO MUCH.  Oh, and by the way, my pedi is scheduled for after class, so don’t judge.

1.   I really wish Lanie  (#InsertNameHere) was teaching this time slot.

Love you guys.